January 8th, 2009
The Fucking Seagulls
Samantha: i can hear my cats breathing across the room
Samantha: it’s weird
SYP: hahaha
SYP: they sleeping
SYP: snoring?
Samantha: sort of
Samantha: kind of more like wheezing
Samantha: no, like whistling
SYP: hahaha
Samantha: like their noses are whistling
SYP: like the seagulls
SYP: hahahahahaha
SYP: one time
SYP: my mother and I were in the car
SYP: driving home from somewhere
SYP: maybe up to Ithaca
SYP: or i dont remember where
SYP: but i was really congested
SYP: and we were 3 hours into the drive
SYP: landlocked middle of nowhere upstate new york
SYP: along route 17
SYP: and the windows are slightly down
SYP: and i hear these seagulls
SYP: and im looking around the sky thinking to myself “where the fuck are these seagulls and what are they doing so far from water”
SYP: so after a few minutes of confusion my mom says to me “what are you looking at?”
SYP: and i’m like “don’t you hear those fucking seagulls? where the hell are they”
SYP: and she starts laughing really loud
SYP: and hard
SYP: and almost pulls over
SYP: cause shes gonna piss herself
SYP: and of course i’ve got my w hat on
SYP: (w hat = what the fuck?)
SYP: and she explains to me
SYP: that I was not hearing seagulls but was in fact hearing my breathing through my own nostrils
SYP: since i had allergies and was congested
SYP: a very high pitched and faint whistle
SYP: was coming from me
SYP: the fucking seagulls
Tags: Birds, Cats, Ithaca, Kate Nash, Mom, Route 17, Samantha, Seagulls
